


Sweet Like Suga

by tacoturtle



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Multi, Other, a lil bit of oikawa and iwaizumi at the end, everything is chaos and i'm not even sorry, momma owl has a lot on his plate, poor akaashi omg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-19
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-06-09 07:29:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6895570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tacoturtle/pseuds/tacoturtle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I have no experience with people under the influence of alcohol; everything you see that is written in this fic I pulled out of my ass to try and appease my coffee shop au impulses. As you read along, you will notice that I did not give two shits nor did I know what I was writing. </p>
<p>Enjoy! <3</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweet Like Suga

**Author's Note:**

> this is probably the greatest fic i have ever made honestly

"Dude, we have like, no food." Kuroo said from the kitchen, opening the cabinets and examining the contents. So far he has only found a container of stale cereal, a box full of cinnamon, and a carton of milk. He doesn't think the milk is supposed to be there.

"What do you mean bro? We have cereal, just eat that." Bokuto said, turning in his position on the couch to look at Kuroo as he stepped into Bokuto's line of sight, stale cereal in hand.

"Have you _seen_ it? It's basically just floppy wheat." Kuroo said, shaking the container. Bokuto sighed and got up from the couch, walking over to Kuroo. Looks like he has to take matters into his own hands.

Bokuto took the box and opened it, immediately greeted with the smell of cardboard. His nose scrunched up in distaste, and Kuroo watched him with a smirk. Bokuto, not willing to back down from this challenge, took a handful of the cereal and shoved it into his mouth. Kuroo raised his eyebrows in interest before laughing at the expression on Bokuto's face. His eyes were screwed shut in obvious disgust, trying to hold the cereal in his mouth before succeeding and swallowing the mouthful in one painful gulp. Kuroo's eyes widened in surprise before smirking in victory as he watched Bokuto run into the kitchen and hastily make himself a glass of water.

"O-Ok, you win," Bokuto panted after downing his drink, "We'll go out. Just let me digest this demon cereal." Kuroo chuckled at his friend, patting his back in sympathy before whipping out his phone and scrolling through his contacts.

"What are you doing?" Bokuto asked, looking at Kuroo's phone with interest.

"Just gonna message someone to hang out."

"Why?"

"I have a feeling today is going to be very interesting." Kuroo's voice held a mischievous lilt to it, smiling at Bokuto before returning his attention to his phone.

Bokuto just shrugged and walked off into the hallway towards his room. "We should go to that new coffee place that opened up last week. Been hearin' its got some good shit. It's pretty close too." Bokuto said, changing into publicly acceptable clothing.

Kuroo hummed in agreement, he knew what coffee shop Bokuto was talking about. He's heard some good things about that place to. Deciding now would be as good of a time as ever, Kuroo finally decided to message the contact his fingers were hovering over.

  
[To: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_hey so me n bo wanna go 2 that new coffee place u wanna come with_

[From: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_What new coffee place?_

[To: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_u know that one that opened up down the street from our apartment_

[From: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_Oh, wait, I remember now. Why not just take Bokuto with you?_

[To: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_i love bo i really do but hes just gonna rant to me abt owls the whole time cmon dont put me through that_

[From: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_So you'd rather have me there with you and Bokuto then just have Bokuto?_

[To: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_if i say yes will u come_

[From: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_I'm pretty sure you would coax Bokuto into dragging me along anyway, so why not_.

[To: Dadchi Sourmura]  
_ok k00l thnx_

  
Bokuto walked back into the living room to see Kuroo sprawled out on the couch, grinning evilly at his phone.

"Um, bro, aren't you gonna change?" Bokuto asked, looking at Kuroo with his eyebrows raised.

"Yea just a sec. Also, Sawamura will be joining us on our coffee shop adventure." Kuroo said, "Try inviting some other people while I go look better than you." He grinned as Bokuto lightly punched his arm, making his way to his own room to get changed as well.

Bokuto flopped onto the couch and took out his phone to, hopefully, convince a certain other person to come with them.

  
[To: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_hey hey hey tsukki!! wanna go somewhere with me and kuroo!?_

[From: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_I thought I told you to stop calling me that. And why on earth would I ever want to go anywhere with you and Kuroo?_

[To: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_wow, harsh (ب_ب)_

[To: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_and because you love us!! sawamura's coming too and you know what they say, the more the merrier!_

[From: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_Bokuto, we both know that if you manage to bring any more people with you the more chaos you'll create._

[To: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_c'mon tsukki!! we're going to that new coffee place (you know the one closest to my apartment)_

[From: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_Yes, I know which one you're talking about. Why should I?_

[To: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_well i'm pretty sure there's free wifi there and me and kuroo will pay for whatever food you want._

[From: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_I feel like you'd drag me anyway so why not. Only if you pay._

[To: ☾T-Rex☽]  
_deal! see you soon, tsukki!_

  
Bokuto locked his phone and sat up on the couch just in time to see Kuroo walking towards the door.

"Ready to go?" He asked, grabbing two jackets off the rack next to the door and throwing one to Bokuto.

"Hell yea let's go."

  
The walk to the coffee shop only took about 20 minutes, but mindless chatter about recent events filled in anything considered a silence. Kuroo halted the heated discussion he was having with Bokuto about whether or not it was safe climbing a telephone pole to look up at the sign on the front of the coffee shop.

Bokuto noticed Kuroo's eyes shift toward the sign and followed his gaze. " _'Sweet Like Suga?'_ Bro, how could we have forgotten a name like this. It's beautiful." Bokuto said, wiping a fake tear from his eye. Kuroo laughed and shoved him playfully before walking inside, the smell of coffee beans and cinnamon hitting his senses as he walked through the door and into the homey little coffee shop.

"Dude, it smells heavenly in here. Why have we never- TSUKKI!!" Bokuto cut himself off with that exclamation and ran over to where he spotted Tsukishima next to a window, sitting with Daichi and two other people Kuroo didn't remember inviting.

Tsukishima had his headphones settled onto his head, but even he could hear Bokuto's voice over his music and jumped in his chair. He sighed and took his headphones off, mumbling incoherently to Daichi as Daichi laughed lightly.

"I'm only here for fre- agh!" Tsukishima yelped in surprise as Bokuto pulled him out of his chair and into a bear hug.

"Hey, that's not fair! Tsukishima!! I want a hug too!" Nishinoya said, sitting across from Tsukishima and next to Tanaka.

Daichi sighed from his seat next to Tsukishima. "Nishinoya, behave yoursel-" Nishinoya cut him off by actually climbing across the table, reaching for Tsukishima who was still in Bokuto's hold. Bokuto grinned and started pulling Tsukishima over the table to Noya, despite the incessant protests of Tsukishima himself.

"Kuroo, Tanaka, please stop them," Daichi said, turning to the other two men at the table before noticing that they weren't even paying attention. Tanaka was close to falling out of his chair in laughter, and Kuroo was trying not to laugh as he was recording the whole thing on his phone.

Daichi sighed. Why did he agree to come here again? Oh yea, because he knew that if he left Bokuto and Kuroo alone in a new place they would most likely either destroy everything or get kicked out. The latter seemed more likely to happen and, wanting to actually be welcome here again, Daichi took a deep breath before closing his eyes.

Tanaka was the first to notice the shift in Daichi's mood, his laughter dying down to nervous chuckles before he held his hands out to Nishinoya and Bokuto to try and stop them.

"Hey, guys, ok, that's enough, Daichi's gonna-"

" _Oi._ " Daichi interrupted Tanaka, and Tanaka tried his best not to shiver visibly at the tone of his voice. They had activated Dadchi Mode™ and now there was no turning back.

"We're in public. Let go of Tsukishima and sit down like the civil people you pretend to be." Daichi said, his voice as hard as the look in his eyes. Bokuto and Nishinoya knew better then to answer back, so they let go of Tsukishima and sat down into their respective seats.

Daichi nodded. "Good. Now, can you tell me why you invited both me and Tsukishima to this place?"

"Only after you explain where these two came from." Kuroo retorted, waving his hand to the other side of the table at Tanaka and Nishinoya.

"Hey, we were here first. We saw Daichi walk through the door and called him over, and then Tsukishima came through and we knew he would be awkward with no one to sit with so we invited him too." Tanaka explained, a grin on his face.

Tsukishima glared at Tanaka. "That's not what happened. They saw me walk in, tried to jump on me from behind, and then dragged me to their table. I only stayed because Daichi was here and he told me that Kuroo wanted to meet with him, so I figured Bokuto would be with him." Tsukishima shrugged.

"Well you were right!" Bokuto said, "I would never leave my bro for anyone," He hooked his arm around Kuroo's neck and pulled Kuroo's head closer to his own, wiggling his eyebrows at Tsukishima while Tsukishima rolled his eyes at him.

"Well, that answers your question, so answer mine. Why did you invite us here?" Daichi asked, looking at Kuroo curiously.

"What, I can't invite a friend to hang out and have fun? Bo, can you believe this guy?" Kuroo scoffed, shaking his head as he turned to Bokuto.

"Yea, what if I just wanted to see Tsukishima, huh?" Bokuto said, shaking his head along with Kuroo.

"You wouldn't have even asked me if I wanted to go anywhere. Last time you 'saw' me we got kicked out of the zoo because you kept trying to climb into the owl exhibit." Tsukishima said, shifting his uninterested gaze over to Bokuto.

Bokuto laughed nervously as he received curious looks from everyone at the table. "Well, what are we waiting for!? Let's order!" Bokuto decided to say, quickly changing the topic of discussion from himself.

"Who's gonna go up to order though? I'm not letting you all parade up to the cashier. It'll just start more chaos." Daichi said, glaring at Kuroo and Bokuto before they could even suggest that very idea.

"I think it should be Dumb and Dumber, considering they were the ones that started all the racket in here." Tsukishima said, smirking at Bokuto and Kuroo as the two men frowned at him.

"Dude, did you just say _'racket'_? What are you, 60?" Bokuto laughed, taking Kuroo's arm and getting up from his seat, "Fine, we'll go. What does everyone want?" Bokuto asked, looking around at the table.

"I want some hot chocolate." Nishinoya said immediately, and Kuroo raised his eyebrows at him.

"Hot chocolate? At a coffee shop? I mean, not to offend, but coffee doesn't stunt your growth." Kuroo snickered as Nishinoya tried to reach for him from across the table.

"It's not that you dick! I just don't like coffee," Nishinoya said, seeing Tanaka smirk out of corner of his eye. He turned and punched Tanaka in the arm, blushing red as Tanaka laughed at him. Everyone at the table looked at them with interest, silently asking Tanaka to explain Nishinoya's odd behavior.

Tanaka turned to Nishinoya as Nishinoya nodded at him, gazed drifting down to the table as Tanaka explained just what is happening.

"Noya has the hots for Man-Bun-McTall Guy over there," Tanaka started, pointing to a man that was a little shorter than Tsukishima with gentle eyes and, indeed, a man bun, cleaning tables and talking with customers, "But neither of us know how to talk to him so we just-" Tanaka paused, thinking about what to say next.

"You just.....Come here? Every day?" Kuroo asked, trying not to laugh.

"Basically." Tanaka shrugged.

"How long have you guys been coming here?" Bokuto asked, turning to Nishinoya, who was uncharacteristically quiet all of a sudden.

Nishinoya mumbled something incoherent, and Bokuto leaned closer to him to try and hear him better. "C'mon! No need to get shy now! How long!?" Bokuto urged.

"Ever.....Ever since it opened." Nishinoya mumbled, his face falling into his hands. Bokuto looked at Nishinoya with wide eyes before breaking out into loud laughter. Kuroo smirked, hiding his grin behind the back of his hand. Daichi looked a little disappointed, and Tsukishima didn't bother to hide the chuckles escaping his mouth.

Nishinoya glared at everyone around the table, blushing deeply. "Weren't you two gonna go up to order? I want my hot chocolate damn it," Nishinoya said, shoving Tanaka as Tanaka laughed at him with everyone.

"Fine, fine. Me and my Brokuto will go now. Anyone else?" Kuroo said, looking around the table at everyone.

"I'll have a salted caramel macchiato," Tsukishima said, glancing at Nishinoya and Tanaka as they started laughing. "Why are you two giggling like idiots?" He asked, looking incredulously at them as the question caused more laughter.

"No wonder you're so salty Tsukishima," Tanaka said in between fits of giggles, causing Nishinoya to laugh harder.

Tsukishima glared at them, deciding not to respond to the two idiots shoving napkins into their shirts trying to create breasts.

"I'll just have an espresso, thanks." Daichi said, as if he was talking to an actual waiter. Kuroo and Bokuto seemed to notice this too and, being the very mature adults they are, grabbed napkins from Tanaka and Nishinoya's stash and made it hang over their forearms.

"Anything else, sir?" Kuroo said, standing tall and smirking as Daichi narrowed his eyes at him.

"Don't do that. Tanaka, do you want anything?" Daichi asked, and Tanaka shook his head no. "Well, ok then. That's all. Go now." Daichi made the gesture to shoo away Kuroo and Bokuto, and the two walked up into the line at the cashier.

Turns out they didn't have to wait long as there wasn't that big of a line, and soon enough they were at the front, talking and patiently waiting for the cashier to turn around and take their orders.

"Ah, I'm very sorry for the wait. What would you like?" The employee asked, turning around and looking at Bokuto and Kuroo.

Kuroo stared at the cashier with interest, taking in his odd appearance. He had blonde hair with black roots and gold, cat-like eyes that stared uninterestingly at Kuroo. It seemed he didn't like to socialize, if his somber demeanor was anything to go by. It wasn't until the guy cleared his throat that Kuroo was aware he was staring.

Kuroo felt a blush rise to his cheeks. Bokuto looked at him with a grin before shoving him closer to the counter. Kuroo shoved back, and they did that for a few moments, just shoving each other back and forth until the guy cleared his throat a second time for their attention.

"Did you want to order?" He asked, his voice as dull as the look in his eyes as he stared back at Kuroo.

Kuroo looked at the cashier. This was dumb. Why lose his cool now? He leaned over the counter and smiled politely at the cashier, causing the guy to move farther away instinctively.

"Afshklgjih? Sgjlwpufhk." Kuroo said, causing the cashier's eyes to widen. Even Kuroo seemed surprised at what had come out of his mouth. Bokuto was laughing his ass off, slamming his hands on the counter in delight at his best friend's suffering.

"Dude, dude oh my god. Oh my god what was that I can't _breathe_ -" Bokuto wheezed, hitting Kuroo on his back and laughing harder. The cashier sent them a wary glance, trying to decide whether or not to call someone else to help settle the two men down. They were being awfully loud.

"Kenma, aren't you supposed to be helping these customers?" Great. Now he was going to get scolded for a customer's rowdiness. Again.

Kenma turned to the person talking to him. "I was just waiting for them to settle down, Akaashi," Kenma said, nodding his head over to the two men. "It's not like there's anyone behind them. Besides, they're very interesting." He turned back to Kuroo and Bokuto after noticing that they had become strangely silent, thinking that they were ready to order. Instead, he saw the two men staring at him and his coworker, mouths slighty agape and eyes wide.

Bokuto was the first to break out of his daze. "BRO CONFERENCE!!" He yelled, throwing his arm around Kuroo's neck and yanking him down so that they were hunched, heads almost touching.

"Dude that guy." Was all Bokuto stated, and Kuroo seemed to immediately understand as he nodded his head sympathetically.

"I know, my bro. The one with the black hair right? God damn he's so pretty. But the other one, the other one bro. He's a fucking _angel_ sent to me from homosexual heaven. I need to know more about him," Kuroo said, turning his head slightly and looking over at the guy talking to his coworker behind the counter.

"What are you two doing?" The question broke them out of their trance and they started at the voice, looking up to see Tsukishima frowning down at them.

"Super secret bro meeting time." Was all Bokuto said, standing up properly and bringing Kuroo with him.

"Yea, you wouldn't understand," Kuroo snickered, high-fiving Bokuto as Tsukishima's frown deepened. Why on earth did they ever think these two could do something as simple as order drinks?

"I don't think anyone would understand but you two idiots," Tsukishima shook his head, walking up to the cashier, "I'm so sorry for them. Can I order?" The cashier nodded and Tsukishima ordered the drinks, walking back to the table and throwing Kuroo and Bokuto a smirk behind his shoulder.

"Hurry up and get back to the table," Tsukishima said, and Kuroo and Bokuto followed behind him, grumbling insults until they finally sat back down.

It took a while for their drinks to prepare ( _"It wasn't our fault the employees are hot!"_ ), and when they were finally finished a voice called out their order.

"Um, Tsukishima?" the voice said. Tsukishima got up from the table when he heard his name, and he walked up to the counter to retrieve their drinks.

Now, that's not necessarily what happened.

Upon arriving at the counter, Tsukishima was going to thank the kind employee, but the words died in his throat as he looked up and saw sharp, light brown eyes with flecks of green in them, looking at Tsukishima expectantly. This man's face had a sort of gentle look to it, but Tsukishima could tell that there was intelligence hidden under those freckles.

The man blushed and laughed nervously, clearly aware that Tsukishima was staring at him. "Um, your drinks, sir?" The man said, and Tsukishima had a blush of his own, trying to regain his composure.

"Kei. Tsukishima Kei," Tsukishima said, holding his hand out for the other man to shake.

The man just smiled, putting the drinks into Tsukishima's waiting palm. He waited until Tsukishima got a good hold on the cupholder before letting go, patting his arm in greeting. "Yamaguchi Tadashi," he said with a tiny smile, causing Tsukishima's blush to deepen.

"Thanks," he mumbled, turning around to make his way back to the group.

Tsukishima walked back to the table, drinks in hand and blush still present, and when he sat down he was immediately bombarded with questions about Yamaguchi.

"Do you have my drink? And why is your face all red, Tsukishima? Got the hots for freckle face over there!? I saw you talking to him before he gave you the drinks, did he give you his-"

"Nishinoya," Daichi said, sending said person a pointed look, "Behave."

Nishinoya grumbled, grabbing his hot chocolate before sitting down in his chair. After Nishinoya grabbed his drink Tsukishima passed out the rest, and the group fell into comfortable conversation about life and anything in between.

The conversation lasted a few minutes before Tsukishima excused himself to the bathroom. After he left, Tanaka pulled what looked like a flask out of nowhere, grinning evilly as he uncapped it and sniffed at the contents inside.

"Ah, pure, liquid courage," Tanaka said, pouring some of the liquid into Nishinoya's drink after Nishinoya held his cup out to him.

"Tanaka, that better not be any alcohol of any kind," Daichi sighed, looking tiredly at both Nishinoya and Tanaka as they grinned at each other.

"Didn't you hear what I said? It's liquid courage, obviously not alcohol." Tanaka responded, waving his hand dismissively.

"Hey, dude," Nishinoya laughed, addressing Tanaka with a mischievous glint in his eyes, "You think Tsukishima's a lightweight?" Tanaka caught on to what Nishinoya was thinking about immediately, grin widening as he put a finger to his chin in thought.

"Hm, I dunno. Guess we gotta find out," and before Daichi or anyone else could stop him, Tanaka quickly grabbed Tsukishima's drink, opened the lid, and poured some of the contents of the flask into his drink. He safely capped it and set it in the place where Tsukishima left it, just as said person came back to the table.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?" Tsukishima asked as he sat down, sending a wary glance over to Tanaka and Nishinoya who were grinning at him.

"Oh, nothing," Nishinoya said, his smile growing bigger as he watched Tsukishima take a sip of his drink, scrunching his nose up before shrugging and drinking more. It tasted different, but there wasn't that much of a change that he should be worried. Maybe it was just him.

Tanaka and Nishinoya high fived as Daichi sighed and Kuroo laughed with Bokuto. Tsukishima looked at everyone around the table before his eyes landed on Daichi, silently asking to explain why everyone was acting so strange.

"Tanaka and Nishino-" There was a collective yell of "NO!" from everyone at the table, excluding Tsukishima and Daichi. Daichi rubbed at his temples and Tsukishima raised his eyebrows. What was happening here?

"You know what? Tanaka, give me some of that," Daichi said, holding his cup of coffee out to Tanaka. Tanaka's eyes widened in surprise before his face split into a grin, taking the flask out again as he poured the contents into Daichi's cup. Daichi took a generous sip of his coffee, sighing and relaxing immediately before going for another.

Tsukishima's eyes widened. "Wait, did you spi-"

"Hey! I want some if everyone else is getting some!" Bokuto interrupted Tsukishima's sentence, slamming his hands down onto the table. He held his drink out to Tanaka expectantly, and Tanaka shook his head at Bokuto, causing Bokuto to frown.

"I think this is the last thing you need," Tanaka laughed, and Bokuto pouted at him before retracting his hand.

"What about Nishinoya? He's worse than me!" Bokuto tried to defend, but Tanaka simply turned his head away. Bokuto narrowed his eyes at Tanaka, Kuroo patting his back in sympathy.

Tanaka took a swig from the flask, sighing in comfort as the liquid traveled its way down his throat. "Shit, why didn't I bring this thing out sooner? Daichi, you want some just from the bottle?" Tanaka asked, swinging the container in front of Daichi's face.

Daichi eyed the flask for a few moments before taking it out of Tanaka's hands, taking a sip as his face scrunched up in displeasure.

"This is very strong, Tanaka. What is it?" Daichi asked, trying to remember where he had tasted this before.

Tanaka grinned lazily as he replied, " _Everclear_." Tsukishima paled at his words, and Daichi's eyebrows shot up in shock.

"Why are you drinking _Everclear_?" Daichi asked incredulously, narrowing his eyes at Tanaka as Tanaka just held his hands in front of himself in surrender. The alcohol was already getting to him, and he had to focus more than usual as Tanaka started speaking.

"I wanted to try something new! I brought it with me because I thought that it would give Nishinoya at least some chance at talking to Mr. Man Bun," Tanaka said, "And if anything goes wrong, he could always blame it on the fact that he's drunk! It's a win-win!" Tanaka grinned, and Daichi sighed once again, shaking his head at Tanaka. There was no stopping him and Nishinoya now.

"Speaking of Nishinoya," Daichi slightly slurred, looking around with confusion on his face, "Where did he go?"

There was a tense silence at the table as everyone just now realized that Nishinoya had gone missing, and just as Tanaka was going to voice his opinion a shrill cry resonated throughout the coffee shop.

"S-sir! Please, get off-"

"Asahi-san!!" That was definitely Nishinoya's voice. The group turned and spotted Nishinoya hanging off Mr. Man Bun as the poor guy was trying to get Nishinoya off of his back.

"Sir, please calm down and get off!" Asahi said loudly, trying to reach behind him and grab Nishinoya's small frame.

Daichi was too far gone to try and help as he drank all of his coffee and took a swig from the flask, the alcohol taking over his sensible mind. He laughed along with Tanaka as Tanaka took a swig himself, cheeks hurting from the grin about to split his face in half.

"Yeah!!! Get some Noya!!" Tanaka laughed, slamming his hands down onto the table. Kuroo and Bokuto looked between each other, trying to decide if it was worth it to stop the mayhem they (for once) didn't cause. Bokuto shrugged and nodded over at Tanaka, and Kuroo nodded back solemnly. The decision was made.

As Tanaka was busy laughing with Daichi about Nishinoya, Bokuto deftly took the flask from his hand and took a giant gulp. After removing the flask from his lips he coughed, because damn this is some strong fucking alcohol. He passed it to Kuroo and Kuroo repeated the gesture, and soon enough they were both as gone as the rest of the group. They nodded once again to each other and got up from the table, swaying slightly and wobbling all the way to the counter where Kenma was.

Kenma, who was watching Asahi try and pry a sobbing Nishinoya from his back, was startled when he felt a hand settle upon his own. He whipped his head down to look at his hand, which was currently resting under a much larger (and warmer) palm. He looked up and saw the flushed face of Kuroo, smiling lazily at Kenma as Kenma tried to move his hand away. Kuroo's grip was strong, though, and feeling Kenma's hand move he leaned over the counter, putting more pressure on it.

"Heeyyy, kitten~" Kuroo sang, leaning closer.

Kenma, now flustered and in a state of panic, called out desperately for Akaashi. His savior ran out of the door behind the counter at the exclamation of his name, and his eyes widened when he saw what was happening.

Nishinoya had somehow made his way onto Asahi's shoulders, still crying (Akaashi could just make out a "why do you have to be so hot, Asahi-san! "Sir, get down please!"), Tanaka was standing next to them, arms raised in a threatening gesture as he yelled about fighting Asahi ("Give me my friend back, stop trying to eat him you giant!!"). Tsukishima had splayed himself across the counter near the coffee machines, and Akaashi could hear a thump as he fell over onto the other side of the counter. He turned just in time to see Yamaguchi, extremely flustered, try and pull Tsukishima to his feet. Tsukishima didn't budge, and so Yamaguchi just crouched down to sit next to Tsukishima's snoring body.

"I.... I'll be right back." Akaashi stated, turning and running back through the door he came from. He could hear someone call his name, but he didn't bother to look back as he made his way to a door at the end of the hall.

He opened the door and spoke quickly. "I'm afraid the cafe is in trouble, Sugawara-san," Akaashi said worriedly to the person sitting at a desk in the room.

"Oh? What happened?" Sugawara turned his chair, looking at Akaashi with interest. This was news to him.

"Chaos." Was all Akaashi said, turning and walking out of the doorway expecting Sugawara to follow him. Sugawara did, and just before they reached the door to the cafe Akaashi said to him, "Prepare yourself."

Sugawara raised his eyebrows, but nodded. It couldn't be that bad, right?

Oh, how wrong he was.

Right as Akaashi opened the door, a stray cup flew and hit just above the doorframe, glass falling from above. Sugawara's eyes widened as he took in the scene before him.

"It got worse," Akaashi mumbled, eyes scanning over the coffee shop's disastrous state.

Now, Asahi and Nishinoya were on the floor, Asahi trying to wrestle out of Nishinoya's hold. Tanaka was cheering Nishinoya on, the handle of a broken coffee cup in one of his hands as he yelled petty insults at Asahi and words of encouragement to Nishinoya. Daichi was sitting on a table, laughing gleefully at nothing in particular. Kuroo was practically throwing himself at Kenma, and Bokuto was looking around as though he lost something. Yamaguchi had somehow fallen asleep despite everything happening, curled around Tsukishima under the counter. It looked as though all the other customers have left, and the ones that haven't were either recording or deciding when a right time to leave would be.

"What....What happened!?" Sugawara shouted over the noise. Daichi was the only one to hear him, everyone else busy with other things, and his head snapped over to look at Sugawara.

"A....Angel!!!" Daichi yelled, pointing his finger at Sugawara. Sugawara looked over at him and blushed. Usually, a handsome man calling him an angel so bluntly would have been a huge compliment for him. Usually. It was clear these people were acting strange and, judging by the flask in one of their hands as they looked around the cafe, Sugawara could guess why they were acting like this.

"How could it have gotten worse? I leave for two _damn minutes-_ "

"Aaaaakaaaaaaasshhhiiiii!!!!"

Sugawara turned to look at Akaashi, confusion written across his features. Akaashi looked confused as well, but his face quickly morphed into an expression akin to surprise as a body collided with his. He yelped as he hit the ground, a very large man with strange black and white hair on top of him.

"Why!? Why are you so pretty Akaashi!? I've never seen anyone as pretty as you Akaashi please stop being so pretty-" Bokuto's babbling caused Akaashi to blush deeply. At some point during his rant, he actually started to cry, holding onto Akaashi and sobbing into his shoulder. Akaashi looked up helplessly at Sugawara, who has laughing at him.

"Such a pretty laugh," breathed a voice, and Sugawara startled as he realized that the man who had called him an angel was standing right in front of him, studying his features with half lidded eyes. Sugawara's blush came back full force, and he let out a nervous laugh as he scratched the back of his head.

"Thanks. Um, I'm gonna have to kindly ask you to leave this place-"

"S-Such a pretty voice..... And a pretty laugh.... A-And a p-pretty face....." Was this man..... _crying_? Oh god, he's crying.

Daichi had his head on the counter, tears spilling from his eyes as he cried and ranted about everything he thought made Sugawara pretty. Which was everything. Sugawara held his face in his hands, his blush spreading to the tips of his ears as he listened to this man rant about how pretty the mole under his eye makes him look.

After a few minutes of continuous ranting from the man in a drunken stupor, Sugawara decided he couldn't take it anymore. "Akaashi!" He called, and then looked down to see the man (now in a very deep sleep) on top of his friend. Akaashi grunted, a sign that he was listening to whatever Sugawara had to say. "I-I'm gonna leave you in charge out here. I still have some paperwork I need to fill out, so, um, bye!" And with that Sugawara ran back through the door that led to his office, Akaashi squawking indignantly from under Bokuto.

Sugawara's departure caused Daichi to sob harder, having lost his "precious angel". Akaashi finally wiggled out from under Bokuto, taking in deep breaths because that man was not light at all. He stood and looked around at the damage of the cafe, sighing in resignation. Sugawara owed him big time for this.

Two tables were broken, as were a few cups (including the one in a sleeping Tanaka's hand). Nishinoya finally crashed out and was laying on the floor, snoring loudly. Akaashi looked to a corner of the room where Asahi sat, shaking in fear. His eyes were wide and his hair was mussed, his arms wrapped tightly around his knees, bringing his legs close to his chest. Yamaguchi and Tsukishima were still sleeping behind the counter (how could they have slept through all that, Akaashi pondered), and Kuroo was still trying to pet Kenma as if he were an actual kitten. Kenma had apparently given up trying to stop him, knowing Kuroo didn't want to hurt him or anything dangerous like that. Kuroo was lazily petting Kenma's head while murmuring what sounded like "pudding head, such a nice kitten."

Akaashi finally deduced the state of the coffee shop:

Total fucking disaster.

He sighed once again as he figured he might as well start cleaning up, walking up to the door and turning the 'Open' sign so that it said 'Closed'. The normal customers quickly finished their drinks and went on their way, choosing to continue with their own lives.

Once all the regulars emptied out of the shop Akaashi grabbed a broom, staring at everything one last time before deciding he should talk to Sugawara about a ban for the people currently sleeping on the floor.

"A ban for life," Akaashi thought out loud, chuckling to himself. He was finally starting to clean up the mess when someone threw the door of the cafe open.

"Aka-chan!! Iwa-chan wanted to try out your coffee so we-" Oikawa stopped his sentence short as he saw the state of the coffee shop, looking at all the bodies sleeping on the floor and then up at Akaashi as he slowly swept up the remnants of coffee cups off the floor.

"Um, you know what, we'll stop by another time. Bye!" And just as sudden as he showed up he was gone, Iwaizumi looking around at the shop in pity before bowing apologetically to Akaashi, running out of the door to try and catch up with Oikawa as he sprinted away.

Akaashi blinked in surprise before bursting into laughter. Of course Oikawa would visit when everything died down. He continued cleaning as if nothing happened, deciding to hold a meeting with Sugawara just in case something like this happened again. And, knowing his boss, something like this would _definitely_ happen again.

**Author's Note:**

> so i finally found out how to work AO3 maybe probably sorta!!  
> if i have time i'll probably post more fics (i've been using wattpad to store all my fanfiction rip)  
> comment if i should like  
> continue this lmao
> 
> (kudos r nice too pls)


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